Want to listen in to my music with me? It seems to soothe the "spirits" of 3 am. Hold on...
The oboe seems to me to be the "outsider" instrument. Kind of nasally, out of the ordinary tone, but it speaks to me. Out of the ordinary... yeah, unique!! This song speaks to me because of the movie, as well. The movie is called The Mission, circa 1986. If you haven't seen it, I guess you could youtube some clips, but it won't do the movie justice.
When I was 17 my dad stood me next to a flag and swore me into the military. SEVENTEEN! Geez! I've had 3 lifetimes since then... at least!!! One of those lifetimes was when I turned 19. I went on a religioius mission to Honduras and Belize for two years. TWO YEARS!! My father, correctly, taught me that I will always go through life with a big space left in my heart if I didn't take the chance that the mission offered to serve others. Apparently some parts of the human heart can only be filled by learning to help others.
Because I had some medical training from the military the mission leadership chose to send me to some remote areas with just some rudimentary medical supplies. It was, without any doubt at all, the best and most difficult time in my life all rolled in together.
No matter which small town I happened to be visiting the word would spread quickly that a big American was in town and I became the town attraction. The kids were the BEST! The little girls would always be scrubbed and have tight little pony tails and they would all try to hold my hands as I walked through town... so CUTE!! Even more funny was the fact that they all wore the plastic "flip flops" or sandals while they tried to keep up with my walking so the slapping of the sandals always made it sound like I had my own applause soundtrack following me around town. I certainly never was able to sneak around town... not with my "midget applauding posse".
(Making "Kid Soup"... Delicious!)
Many times people ask me how I could stand to see such poverty and desperation every day as I walked around. I honestly never saw poverty or desperation. I saw quiet dignity and a spirit of solid faith in God, that I had rarely seen in the states. There's a HUGE difference between being humble and being poverty stricken.
For better or worse, my life is different now. But I know my heart is better for having given part of it to those humble and noble people.
Why am I telling you this? At three am??? Is it because you're heart will be missing a piece until you decide to share it it? I don't know... Maybe it's because there may be times when you will wake up at three am and have your own demons to deal with. Maybe you will be looking for reasons to say you have done something for someone else that is worthy of redemption. Maybe redemption can be found in the strangest of places... and with the sounds of applause from 50 little midget kids!
WHATEVER... It's 3 am and you will obviously have to deal with your own 3 am struggles in your own best way. But, for me, I know what helps. It's a bit chilly here in the "Country Music Capital" Nash-Vegas and I have to go running now.
By the way, on an aside... today is the birthday of Pepe Le Pew, the amorous skunk from the Bugs Bunny cartoons. The anthropomorphic symbol of love in the after school cartoons! I was always a little jealous of his "bold" romanticism. Anyway, just thought you might want to know that little piece of "history" today.
Pepe Le Pew.... (chuckling to myself)
Here's another song that gets me through til the sun breaks... whatever it takes right?
Listen to the words...